IMHO

When I was about ten years old my father took my brothers and I to an Island for a winter get away.  There I met a girl wise in years, (she was twelve).  One evening I asked if she could join us for dinner.  She leaned over to me pointed to something  on the menu and said, "See? THIS is why I do not eat any meat at all."

The item was Dolphin. 

Dolphin?!

Immediately I became a vegetarian.  Unless bacon was involved.  It did not matter that my favorite stuffed animal was a a pig (named Piggy), bacon held a spell over me.  But the rest of the meat family was off limits.  Was I really expected to eat Bugs Bunny and Bambi?

I did not remain a vegetarian for long and it was years and years later that I learned Dolphin is also a fish.  Now more known by its original name of Mahi Mahi.  One that I happen to love.

I held on to my opinion for years before discovering the truth,  The Dolphin on the menu was not the one who smiles, jumps in waves and says, "Faa loves Bee".

This is an election year and I am being bombarded by politico opinions.  At some point our politicians opted not to tell us what they would do if elected, but rather they decided to use their time to tell us what their opponents are doing wrong.  This includes everything from what they did in college, or denied doing, to where they worship. 

They have very strong negative opinions of each other.

If someone has too many opinions they are "opinionated".  Not usually used in a positive sense.  If a person has few opinions they are wishy washy.  Again, not seen as a good thing.

Then there is me.

A friend often asks me my opinion on certain things.  She is not asking for advice, she clearly has already developed her own answer and just wants to see where I stand on the matter.  I have found that most of the time I have no opinion one way or another on the subject in question.  It has neither entered into my radar, or the only opinion I can give is that I have none.

This may seem apathetic, but I prefer to look at it as a moment to learn something.  I will listen to my friend's opinion and most likely follow that up with some minor research until I can form some sort of opinion on the matter.  To wit I often end up with the same opinion; I have none. 

Next to politicians the most opinionated people are those that fall into the age group of what we call "teenagers". 

Having at various times a house full of opinionated teens I have played devils advocate to see how far into their convictions they are.  I have the advantage of age to not engage in their passionate opinions as I once held a few myself.  Their enthusiasm is commendable, and I know they are only trying to define their beliefs and thus define themselves.

One year as my children were preparing to start school a close friend of mine told them to be "Happy Sponges".  A brilliant turn of phrase.  What they did not understand is that sponges have the ability to be squeezed of all things, go back to its original form and begin again.  My friend did not say, "Be Happy Wet Cement."

I am always curious of people's opinions.  Not so much what the opinion is on, but rather why they feel so strongly about it.

Asked recently, "How did Star Wars not change your life completely?"  Here is what I remember about the epic release of this life changing monumental movie.  It was 1977 and   I stood in line with my friend and her father.  My own father was in the hospital and I was jealous when my friends father took her hand in his.  That is all I remember about the movie.  I was eleven years old.  It did not change my life.  I did not hate the movie or love it into fandom.  It was just a movie.

I am not a sports person and hold no strong convictions about any team of any sport.

I tend to keep many of my positive opinions to myself as I have had them verbally shot down, and subsequently poked fun at for having those opinions at all.  "I can not believe you think she is a good dancer, she obviously sucks...oh my god that song is awful why on earth would you like it?...what do you mean he was a good painter? look at those horrible brush strokes..."

The best I can do is, "She is not technically the best I agree, but she is lost in the movement which is something so many dancers lack...I have loved this song since I was fourteen and it has helped me in emotional times of need...I see the entire painting and when I look at it it makes me feel good."

Possibly not the most educated of retorts.  Not even the most impassioned of responses. 

My  lack of opinions, or of expressing the ones I have with pithy, is just a choice I make.

I will listen to your opinions.  I may change my own based on your arguments, but I will not try to persuade you to take on mine, as I know for the most part I am acting a sponge and I know my opinions may change, take new shape, or be squeezed out of me.

People used to say, "In my humble opinion."  Opinions now are expressed as facts. 

Plato says, "Opinion is the medium between knowledge and ignorance."

I will most likely continue to be the person who does not express my opinions with vengeance.  I will remain the sponge, changing, redefining, and in a constant state of learning.


Lest you think I am void of all opinions I offer these to you without preamble, explination, or reason:
Getting in to a made bed is always more comfortable.
Thunderstorms are awesome.
Teach Safe Sex not abstinence.
Gay marriage should be a given.
Blue toenail polish makes me happy.
Ooh Child is my favorite song.
I don't think Angelina Jolie is pretty or a good actress.
Though I have no cubist or surrealist art in my house Paul Klee is my favorite painter.
Abortion should be safe and legal and left up to a woman to decide.
Chanel makes the best handbags.
Lakes are better than pools.
My children are more amazing than most.
Forgiveness is not given nearly enough.

In the words of the truest happy sponge ever introduced to culture, "...And that is all I have to say about that."